{ Photo by Sofía Moya on Unsplash }

Got yourself vaccinated yet?

At first, I was feeling so... apprehensive. Mind you, I am not an anti-vaxxer. But originally I thought it feels so band-aid-ish, akin to a placebo effect. Not to mention, what kind of vaccine you can develop in less than a year? Why are there so many types in the market? Why are those first batches suffered so many side effects? What would the side effect on me be? Would it be safe?

The driver that took me to the vaccination center joked that people are more afraid of the side effects rather than the vaccine itself. And honestly, I agree. Who could blame him for thinking such? Something foreign is injected inside of our body. COVID-19, despite how many lives it took, is invisible, and what you can't see can't hurt you. Sayings of our fathers and mothers. We are built on this. We operate on this. It's easier to ride on this notion rather than an explanation of long and hard-to-spell medical jargon, seemingly further than reach. The thing of the smart and educated ones.

Nevertheless, I go. The thought of finally going to places (okay, cinema) feeling a lot safer already got me giddy. It's a little sad that many people get vaccinated solely to earn that permit to enter malls. But I couldn't care less. The more people got vaccinated, the better, whatever their objective is. Surely the vaccination rate spiked. It's all right with the world. Moreover, people are tired. A long year of the pandemic with so much neglect from the government that keeps on policing the already helpless and turning a blind eye on the rich is just so frustrating. The vaccine is that one ticket to go out and experience the (new) normal. For me, for you, for everyone.

Go get yourself vaxxed. Let's be friends afterward.

And now I miss blogging.

Like, yes, it's a monthly thought. But this time I feel the urge to write. Maybe would result in a mishmash of words but I am gonna put it out in this not-so-private room of mine.

Previously titled "Tales from the Pandemic" but I don't want to mess with the search in these trying times. So that's it. Basically just a recollection of moments and thoughts I had during 2020, the start of the pandemic, to this day.

I have posted some updates as of August 2020 and everything is basically still the same. The struggle to maintain a healthy work-rest balance, trying to stay sane and not to lose myself in the process, finding the effort to find some joys in the mundane. It's alright. Although I do feel like I have been crying more often because everything feels like driving me insane in this house. The situation during pre-vaccine announcement was rather a gloom. Every time I go out to buy essentials and withdraw some cash I have to be extra careful when most people couldn't be bothered to wear masks and come in big groups. The employee couldn't do a lot to shoo them out because the sales have been low it's great that someone is coming for a purchase or two. I endured and finished my business to practically bolt home.

I got my shot last month, the second dose too at the beginning of the month. So all is good.

Now get this. I am a very lazy person, who unfortunately became the first line of defense when it comes to cleaning up. It's such a chore to live with so much junk accumulated in a day in various dust, fallen hair, even tissues and droplets of water. It's a battle to constantly clean and sanitize the whole shit I often thought of burning down the house and building my own possession from scratch so that I can start with way less. (Knock on wood) I don't know... I think I am just living with memories? In form of stuff and junk that I don't even have ownership of or belong to me in the first place. The whole quarantine/lockdown/social distancing has birthed a new view I have on stuff and possession. I remember a saying along the lines of "Poor people can't afford cheap stuff". I felt it strongly for a year or so. Seeing stuff I have don't really hold up after a few months of use because I sacrificed the best with the available. Quite a reality check, I say.

For now, I don't know. I still have a ton of stuff I'd like to dump from my house. I have a strong urge to scrub the hell out of this space. It's not helping that it's been very hot for a couple of days it's unbearable to stay in. Added touch to the whole suffocation I have been having for the past weeks, months.

I hope you, who read this, have been well. Hang on there. I am trying too.

i blinked and almost a year passed by without an update...

honestly, 2020 so far can be summed up in one word: awkward. every day is the new normal. neverending period of adjustment I hate to relive as if it's groundhog day. anyone feels the same? despite everything, it's been alright. sure the global pandemic hasn't been easy on most people, i     included. but I guess if anything, i shall look for the silver lining... if there's any...

so yeah, here are some updates from january to mid-august from yours truly, who felt like running out of love from blogging yet still wanting to buy new theme(s) and/or switching to squarespace. oh, the neverending struggle.